Grad School Nightmares

I realized that, for one reason or another, I have been neglecting my poor blogspot. I've chosen the more traditional route of physical writing. With a pen. And a "journal." Yes, they still exist. Truth be told, readers, there are sometimes things I don't want to share with the world.

I also realized that I was posting links to things I found interesting, with a few comments thrown in. The "internaute" version of plagiarism. Boring. So, I guess I'll have to cut that out. Not completely, of course, because sometimes I find things that are worth mentioning. For the most part, my aim is to be a little more personable.

I'm facing the issue of writing a "statement of purpose." I don't know how to write about myself, let alone my accomplishments.

"Dear Grad School: Please let me in. Thx."

I don't think it will work. I don't know how to be witty and intellectual at the same time. I don't want to be factual and boring, but I don't want to lose my sense of academic integrity. I mean, hell, I'm applying to Ivy League schools, I need to sound like I'm worth the risk. But, I want to stand out. I want to be remembered. I want to prove that I'm not just some girl who fucked up her first chance at college when she was given enough scholarships to not only pay for 4 years, housing, and food, but enough to PAY HER to go to college. This will follow me for the rest of my academic career, and I hate it. I screwed up for a boy, yes. It's true. I thought getting married was more important than education at the time. But I was also 19, alone, and afraid. Now, I'm a bit wiser, and a bit older. I'm ready to take on both academic and romantic challenges, but I will never pit one against the other, ever again. I hope my past mistakes won't prevent me from getting the education I want and deserve. I think, deep down, I hope that I actually deserve it. Some days... I'm not so sure.